The New Normal

Four days ago, I was at work.  I had students and was working as normal, training as normal, and anticipating my kids coming home for Spring Break.  Today, I am grateful for finding toilet paper and ground turkey at Kroger.

I've always joked that the cockroaches and viruses are going to win in the end, but...damn.

Two days ago, I did a circuit class but decided doing jiu jitsu might be a little risky, so I declined open mat rolls.

One day ago, I celebrated a friend's birthday with my kids and made a grocery run without concern.  By last night, I was reconsidering everything and cancelling plans to train in my gym and have lunch with a friend.

Today, I only went out to drop off my car for service and walked/jogged  home alone.  I declined that shuttle service and washed my hands as soon as I walked in.

Now, my  kids' university is only online this semester and they are living here indefinitely. Now, we are on next to lock down and only going outside to walk in relative solitude.  Social functions have slowed to a near halt and our city is almost on lockdown.  Starting tonight, bars will close, and clubs will close, concerts are cancelled and restaurants are on take out only status.

I'm living the life I only have read about in history books.  I mean, we have all read about the Spanish influenza and maybe the plague.  But it's so hard to put in context with our daily lives.  So hard to relate to, as modern citizens, but here we are.

This is the life my grandmother lived, and I think about that sometimes.  So far removed from the society that feels like everything is fixable.  Modern medicine can mitigate all things.  But it's not so and this is proof.

My 2020 resolution was about living with gratitude and some days this week it has been hard to find that gratitude.  But, here goes.  I am in a safe place, with both of my children.  So far, we are pretty healthy and have all the things we need to continue to live mostly comfortably.  So, we are kind of sick of one another already and would like to go out for more than a walk - but this is a total first world kind of problem.

I am currently alone, without a partner, so I go to bed alone.  But I have friends who love me and check in on me, and - while it's not the same as having a partner - I'm ok.  I have love in my life.   All ok there.

About 15 month ago, I busted up my knee and promised to get back to full physical strength.  It's been a difficult year, but I keep working and trying everyday.  I can jump on my leg and I can run.  It's going to take some time, but gratitude that I can keep trying.  Keeping moving, no matter what.

I have a job I love.  Doing it online will be challenging, but I can do this.  We all can do this, and I am proud of my team.  Let's move forward with plans for later this summer. We've got this!

So, gratitude I have love and my healthy  kids, and my stable friends, and an ability to help others.  It's all I can I hope for going into day two of staycation 2020.  Gratitude, my friends, is all we can expect.  Gratitude is a choice.  The rest is just a wild ride.